Is this the beginning of the end?

Recently things have been a bit rough and it's starting to make me wonder if this is IT. The rest of my life is just going to be unhappy, filled with negativity and that love will just die away. Should we have tried living together to see if we can stand each other in the first place? So far it's been in my thoughts. Personally I don't agree with it because regardless of whether one lives together or not, it's about love and acceptance right? Does it mean that if we are arguing more we just decide to give up?

Recently I feel like I'm getting a whole lot of critism and it's as if he's 'giving in' to my character rather than 'accepting' it. It's always " you're always this way!" or "yah la whatever you say". It's the same way he talks to his mum when he thinks " she always thinks she's right" but when did everything start becoming proving who's in the right or wrong?

If I could just write a letter I would say : Im not out to prove my point to say I'm right or it's my way or the highway, it's just me saying what i feel and to let you see how I see it so there's clarity. Let me hear your point of view too. When I question you, that's all it is, a question. There is not hidden agenda behind it, certainly not to fight you or prove anything. I just want to understand, that's all. So please be patient with me; don't raise your voice or be impatient . It's hurtful and makes me feel so lousy about myself .

I'm not perfect , nor are you. I would appreciate as much leeway and kindness as you give yourself in your own faults too. When you're critical it makes me wish I am loved for who I am and I start looking at others around me and envy their relationship. Can't you just love me?

Sigh... Well we just have to keep hoping for the best. They say the first 5 years are the hardest.

This is my last year as a twentysomething.

Recently I've been concerned that no one really understands me and I'm this giant oddball to them. Ever tried explaining something important to someone you hope will understand and see your point of view only to have them just cut you off before the whole story is finished and let you know what they really think before they even got to the point you were trying to make? It's so damn frustrating. And the worst part is when you disagree or try to explain why you feel a certain way they immediately judge you and just say you only want to hear what you want to hear.

I mean, are you seriously kidding me? I haven't even finished what I wanted to say. I hear what I want to hear? You just say what you want to say. I wonder if we would be this direct and forward and so quick to jump the gun if it was with people we don't know well. It seems the people we hurt the most are those that are the closest to us. I need to remind myself not to impose my opinions on others. I probably do that too and not realize it.

Today although I was really happy overall, it seemed to be quite saddening afterall. You cannot depend on anyone or anyones opinion. You have to make your own opinions and believe in it and get your strength from that. You have to believe that nothings impossible and that hope is always around the corner.

This is not to say that you don't listen to the opinions of people around you and just have your own way. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion but we have to agree to disagree and respect each other.